Those that hesitate, or react in the wrong manner, become footnotes in history, while those that come through in the clutch reap eternal glory for their prowess. I never look for such situations where split second decision making, and remaining cool under pressure are paramount to the wellbeing of others.
However, I often find myself in such instances where deep rooted, primal instincts to read and react are fundamental to preventing a calamitous situation.
One of my first Thai friends happened to be a Colonel in the Thai equivalent of the FBI. At first I was intimidated by this Glock toting, combat veteran lush, then overtime an enduring friendship developed.
He anointed himself my sworn protector, and I embraced his assistance in figuring out this seemingly insane country. I remember one of the first times we met at an old Chinese teakwood pub, in the company of a bottle of whiskey.
We talked politics, war, life; all subjects in which I was somewhat well versed. Then he made a piercing revelation that made me tremble. "I get very cold sometimes, and I can't sleep at night. I've had nightmares about something that happened in the South of Thailand.
One night I was on a patrol with several other comrades in the very thick jungle. Many Muslim insurgents had been known to frequent the area so we were all on high alert. Suddenly, there was a rustle in the trees about 50 meters from our position.
We froze. Then contact, a threat was perceived and we lit up the area. Our M-16s silenced the noise and we proceeded to determine the nature of the suspected combatants. Children. The bullet riddled corpses of what appeared to be a six year old boy and girl were all that remained of the rustle in the bushes."
This revelation profoundly impacted me and solidified our relationship. He professed something that was such a great source of torment to someone that was a relative stranger.
I told him to seek professional guidance, and he did (that's another story). Fast forward to a year later. I'd been in Thailand for over a year, and was relatively proficient in traversing the bustle of Bangkok.
We decided to meet for a drink after almost six months of not seeing each other due to work. Of course we rendezvoused at the same Chinese teakwood pub.
I could tell that he was already intoxicated by the time I got there. Despite this understanding, a fresh bottle of DeWars provided the ideal companion for this reunion, and I, often reckless, in that sometimes I live like Nicholas Cages's character in Leaving Las Vegas, did not protest.
We swapped stories about the happenings of the last few months, and like usual talked politics, war, and life. Then we decided to move on to an old haunt down the street, that was a little more lively.
At this point, after consuming a whole bottle of DeWars, we collectively decided that enjoying a pitcher of beer Singh was a good idea, which it probably was not. After scaring away a gaggle of Korean tourists that were sitting at a table next to us, I realized P'Jimmy[alias], was significantly more drunk than I was.
Not too surprised, and relieved that P'Jimmy only lived a few hundred yards from our position, I pounded that pitcher of beer Singh, with the dual goals of sending him home as soon as possible and preventing him from consuming anymore alcohol.
We 'checked bin' our way out of there, and I proceeded out the door to suck down a cig, and wait for P'Jimmy. This was probably my fatal wrong move of the night, and why I left a bit ahead of him is something I have psycho analyzed many times, and the most obvious explanation was that I was embarrassed by his sheer drunkenness.
I know this reflects poorly on me, but fuck it, it is what it is. In my defense, I'm usually not too concerned about the wellbeing of a Glock toting combat veteran with police impunity, and perhaps I too was a little intoxicated.
As I enjoyed my cig at the perimeter of the pub, I noticed a strange circumstance begin to emerge. One particularly perturbed Thai individual, whom I thought was a server at the aforementioned pub, began to aggressively question P'Jimmy.
Due to the limitations of my abilities to understand drunken Thai, I have absolutely no idea what they were talking about, other than what I can guess. And I guess, that P'Jimmy said and or did something inflammatory in his state of advanced drunkenness.
A large group of Thai males, about eight or so, began to encircle P'Jimmy, whilst I, being a paranoid foreigner, hung back and maintained a heightened level of situational awareness. Suddenly, the previously mentioned suspected server with eight males backing him, pushed P'Jimmy to the ground.
My pulse began to accelerate, and decisions were no longer being made in the realm of my conscious mind, rather in the depths of my primal subconscious. It was fight or flight, and I knew in this instance P'Jimmy would not back down no matter the circumstance.
Additionally, my mind was absolutely focused on one thing, and one thing only; the high-capacity military issue Austrian made Glock with hollow point bullets, calmly resting in P'Jimmy's commando shoulder bag.
As predicted P'Jimmy did not back down, and the group of males encircling him grew ever more aggressive. My primal subconscious took control and I sprung into action.
I was not going to allow my close friend to make a ruinous decision on my watch, I knew that if I continued to stand idle, someone was going to be threatened or worse with the weapon that they had no idea was there.
I calmly sauntered over to the group as to not appear hostile or aggressive in my movements. I looked at P'Jimmy, and calmly said in the best Thai that I could muster at the moment, "Go Home quickly."
He gave me a blank stare and did not move. Then something, something so primal, something so purely instinctual took over as it often did in times like this.
I belted out like a commanding General towards an insubordinate officer with eyes wide in psychotic and focused rage, with all my soul, with everything I am, with every hope and every dream. "P'JIMMY, GO HOME NOW!"
He then proceeded to follow my command. The group of men seemed equally dumbfounded and intimidated, as though they did not expect such a forceful outburst from a 120 pound skinny white boy.
I walked him back to his condo, which was not far away, and left him in the hands of a trusted security guard. I commenced back towards the street and to my surprise the usually ineffective police were investigating the scene.
I, of course, was singled out for questioning and a half-ass search. My Thai speaking ability is usually somewhat limited to a few key phrases, however it seems as though whenever the police are around I become a well versed and nearly fluent speaker.
I answered their questions with poise and explained, as best I could, that the main figure in question was in fact a Colonel, and could easily smite their dismal 40 baht bribe taking careers.
I was allowed to leave in haste, and made way for the safe confines of my home. I'm not very big or strong, I'm not an especially skilled unarmed combatant, and I don't have loads of money.
But I do possess one thing, that I feel is greater than any of the aforementioned; the ability to come through in high pressure situations that demand split second decision making. Now, if only I could say the same thing about my long term decision making processes...
